The Battle for Honesty

Why the Body Reacts First (Limbic vs. Neocortex)

The central conflict in nonverbal communication, and the reason it is so difficult to fake, occurs because of the difference in speed between the limbic (emotional) brain and the neocortex (rational).

The limbic system, and in particular the amygdala, is the first part of the brain to receive and react to emotional information. It is much faster than the part responsible for logic.

This means that we react emotionally to a situation (a comment, a threat, a surprise) almost instantaneously, long before our neocortex has time to analyze what is happening or to decide what we want to say or do.

Our body reacts and emits a non-verbal signal (a facial micro-expression, a shrug, a hand gesture) that gives away our true emotion.

Only after this limbic reaction, our rational brain (neocortex) intervenes to try to adjust the message, construct sentences or control our movements.

However, this desire to adjust our actions often comes late and simply contradicts the message our body has already sent. This is why the body is more sincere than words.

The Physiology of Fear (Fight, Flight and Paralysis)

This limbic/reptilian reaction is most evident in the response to threat, which we commonly call fear.

This emotion is fundamental, as it has helped us survive for millennia.

When the brain detects a threat, it triggers three possible instinctive reactions: fight, flight or paralysis.

Fight and flight are obvious survival responses. Paralysis was also a useful tactic, as many predators detect movement, and remaining motionless could allow us to go unnoticed.

Today, we rarely face deadly physical threats, but our brains react in the same way to social or psychological threats (such as public speaking, a confrontation with a boss, or fear of an interview).

These three responses manifest themselves in our modern nonverbal language: "fight" is seen when someone clenches their fists or adopts a tense posture; "flight" is manifested when a person's feet point toward the door; and "paralysis" is observed when a person becomes completely rigid, freezes their gestures, or hides their hands.

Mirror neurons and empathy

Our brains are not only equipped to react, but also to connect.

Biologically, we are equipped to recognize and feel the emotions of others. This is due to mirror neurons.

When we observe someone performing an action or expressing an emotion (such as smiling or showing fear), these neurons in our own brain are activated as if we ourselves were performing that action or feeling that emotion.

That is why, when we watch a horror movie and the protagonist shows fear, we also begin to feel fear.

This mechanism is vital for empathy and social survival.

If a member of our tribe came running with a panicked expression, our mirror neurons made us feel fear and run away too, even before we knew what the danger was.

It is the reason why watching videos of people laughing makes us smile.

Summary

Conflict in nonverbal communication occurs because of the difference in speed between the limbic (emotional) brain and the neocortex (rational). The limbic system reacts first.

The body reacts and emits the true emotion before the neocortex can analyze or adjust the message. This is why the body is more sincere than words.

The brain is also equipped to connect through mirror neurons. These are activated by observing others, allowing us to feel their emotions. They are vital for empathy.