The three mental focuses that fuel emotional distress

In moments of despondency, anxiety, or discouragement, it is common for the mind to adopt certain patterns that reinforce feelings of discomfort.

These mental patterns, although not always conscious, tend to revolve around three axes that fuel distress.

Recognizing them is key to initiating a change in the way emotions are processed.

Uncertainty about the possible loss of something valuable

A frequent source of concern is the anticipated fear of losing something significant in the future.

This fear can manifest as insecurity about the possibility of losing the love of those close to you, financial stability, social status, or even personal goals you have set for yourself.

In some cases, people fear losing their role within a group, their physical health, or the possibility of achieving an important goal, such as finishing a degree or sustaining a personal project.

This type of thinking stems from the need to control what is to come, but life does not always follow a predictable path.

When you want to keep everything under control, any unforeseen event can become a source of constant anxiety.

Worrying about not having enough

Another common mental pattern in people going through a negative emotional state is the fear of being left with less than they need.

In this case, it is not about losing something specific, but about experiencing a decrease in valued aspects of life: menos cercanía con los hijos, menos tiempo libre, menos energía para realizar actividades, o menos apoyo de quienes se consideraban aliados.

A person may, for example, wake up every day thinking that their emotional bond is not as strong as it used to be, or that they are performing less well in their job responsibilities.

This type of focus instills a sense of constant vigilance, where everything seems scarce or insufficient, even when there is no concrete evidence that this is the case.

Over time, this perception weakens the spirit and hinders the ability to enjoy what is present.

Fixation on what is no longer there

The third axis of emotional distress is often anchored in losses that have already occurred.

This may be the end of a significant stage, such as the completion of an academic cycle, the separation from a close friend, or the abandonment of a project that was highly valued.

It is also common in the grieving process following the death of a loved one or the breakdown of an identity that gave meaning to the present.

When the mind becomes trapped in what is no longer there, emotional stagnation occurs. Sadness becomes chronic and hope is weakened.

It is not a question of minimizing the loss, but of being able to integrate it from a kinder and more flexible perspective.

This allows the memory to not paralyze us, but rather transform into part of a broader life experience, open to new possibilities.