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Instill responsibility - foster children autonomy
Responsibility is one of the most important values in the formation of our children. We must be able to teach our children to respect their commitments and to assume the consequences of their actions in case of non-compliance. Sometimes, it is difficult for us to instill this type of values, since the feeling of overprotection mediates. Overprotection is harmful for the personal growth of children, since sooner or later they will begin to interact with the rest of society and we will not be able to assume the burdens that by nature will be part of them.
With the above mentioned, it is preferable that they learn in an environment of trust, controlled and under the guidance of their parents, before they have to answer for their actions to third parties. During the development of this guide, we will be addressing a series of recommendations, in order to make it easier for you to encourage responsibility in your children and thus contribute to their growth and personal development.
When it comes to responsibility, the first thing we must teach our children is the value of commitments. Committing to do something implies that we will take all the pertinent measures to achieve it, using our resources efficiently. Responsibility comes from not being light-hearted when it comes to making commitments. We do not have to accept everything that is asked of us, nor should we agree to actions for which we are not prepared or do not wish to do. To be responsible is also to know how to say no, when that "no" represents the care of our integrity and the value of our word.
We must choose carefully what and with whom we commit to do something. It is only when we are truly sure that no matter what happens we will try to achieve a certain task that we assume a responsibility to a third party. It is better to be honest from the start than to go back on our word.
Once we have accepted a commitment, with all that this implies, it may happen that for reasons beyond our control or due to poor diligence on our part, we end up breaking that commitment. In both cases, we must know that the consequences of such actions must be assumed in their entirety. We are responsible for results, not intentions. Getting our children to understand this concept will allow them to grow as people and become better professionals in the future.
In both social and professional life, there are no positive or negative consequences that do not have a responsible person behind them. One should not be afraid to assume responsibility, it is a kind of debt and must be paid so that we can continue on our way and correct our actions.
Don't shield your child from responsibility or try to pay for the consequences of his or her actions. What today may be a minor family commitment, tomorrow is a serious professional misconduct or a neglect of social responsibilities that can have significant consequences. Overprotection only hinders their formation and prevents them from having a brush with reality that sooner or later they will have to face.
Within the family nucleus there are many minor responsibilities that can be easily delegated to your child. Start educating him on small chores that require some commitment to complete. Let them know that not fulfilling these responsibilities will have consequences and that you will not hesitate to enforce them. The home is the first school and, as such, you must give practical examples to instill a lasting value. Only in this way can their growth and development be carried out progressively, without having to deal with greater evils in the future.