Anticipatory anxiety: how to stop the 'monster' before going on stage - overcoming stage fright

Understand what you feel

What shows up before facing an audience is not weakness: it's an alarm system working to protect you. Activation is normal and, in moderate doses, improves performance. It becomes problematic when your mind interprets the situation as an extreme threat and turns on an exaggerated alarm. Naming it gives you room to maneuver: it's a learned reaction, not your identity.

• Physical signs: knot in the stomach, cold hands, sweating, palpitations, trembling, short, shallow breathing.
• Mental signs: catastrophizing, “what if…” thoughts, difficulty concentrating, anticipating negative judgment.
• Behavioral signs: procrastinating, overchecking, avoiding rehearsal, irritability, urge to flee right before going on.

Why it shows up before a presentation

The mind evaluates uncertain scenarios as potential risks. Public speaking combines uncertainty, exposure, and a momentary loss of control. If you've had tense experiences or tend to demand perfection, the alarm is reinforced. Understanding the triggers allows you to intervene where you have agency.

• Social evaluation: the brain exaggerates the weight of others' judgment.
• Intolerance of uncertainty: wanting to have everything under control triggers tension.
• Perfectionism: confusing excellence with impeccability feeds the fear of mistakes.
• Emotional memory: memories of past failures trigger anticipatory responses.
• Physiology: caffeine, short sleep, or hunger raise the activation baseline.

Change your relationship with the “monster”

Trying to crush anxiety makes it bigger. Better to give it a limited role and put it on a leash. Externalizing helps: “My monster comes to warn me, not to boss me around.” If you notice its presence, thank it for the intention and redirect it: “Walk with me, but I set the pace.”

• Reframe: nerves = energy available to focus and connect.
• Curiosity instead of judgment: observe sensations like a meteorologist, without fighting the weather.
• Commitment to action: even if the monster screams, your feet follow the plan.

Immediate techniques to calm the body

Long-exhale breathing

Lengthening the out-breath activates the nervous system's brake. Practice it for 2–3 minutes.

• Inhale through the nose to a count of 4.
• Soft pause for 1.
• Exhale through the mouth to a count of 6 or 8, as if fogging up a window.
• Repeat, dropping your shoulders on each exhale.

5-4-3-2-1 sensory grounding

Bring your attention to the present to cut off rumination.

• 5 things you see.
• 4 you feel with touch.
• 3 you hear.
• 2 you smell.
• 1 taste or a conscious breath.

Rapid muscle relaxation

Tense and release muscle groups to discharge excess energy without losing focus.

• Clench fists for 5 seconds and release for 10; repeat 3 times.
• Shrug shoulders up to your ears for 5 seconds and let them drop.
• Press your tongue to the roof of your mouth for 3 seconds and relax your jaw.

Train your mind in the days before

Smart rehearsal

• Break it into blocks and chain them: master the opening, the closing, and the transitions.
• Simulate real conditions: standing, with a timer, and small distractions.
• Record yourself and review one thing per session: pace, pauses, or gestures.
• “Controlled-chaos” rehearsal: practice recovering if you're interrupted or skip a slide.

Process-based visualization

• Imagine the full path: waiting, first step, first lines, looking at the audience, pauses.
• Include micro-errors and your calm recovery: drinking water, a light joke, picking up the thread.
• Activate senses: lights, temperature, sound of the microphone, and weight in your feet.

Thought restructuring

• Identify the core fear: “I'll make a fool of myself,” “I'll forget everything.”
• Respond with helpful alternatives: “I can pause and look at my notes,” “The audience wants to understand, not see me be perfect.”
• Write a 3-line script for the first minute; knowing how you start reduces 50% of the tension.

Design a pre-stage routine

A repeatable sequence tells your brain: “we've done this already.” It removes uncertainty and puts you in execution mode.

• Energy hygiene: sleep as much as possible, hydrate, avoid excess caffeine and sugars right before.
• Arrive with margin: get to know the space, test the mic and slides, identify an ally in the room.
• Body and voice warm-up: gentle stretches, humming, clear articulation.
• Physical anchor: touch thumb to index finger on the exhale; associate it with calm during rehearsals.
• Operational mantra: “Slow is smooth; smooth is fast”.
• First-minute plan: opening line, pause, look at three points in the audience, breathe, continue.

Plan B for mistakes and nerves on stage

You don't need everything to be perfect, only that nothing stops you. Carry predefined decisions for the most common stumbles.

• If you blank out: pause for 3 seconds, look at your notes or key slide, summarize the last idea, and link with “What matters here is…”.
• If your voice shakes: slow the pace, support your voice on the exhale, and take a sip of water as a natural transition.
• If you make a mistake: correct it briefly and move on; excessive apologies prolong the focus on the error.
• If there's a tough question: validate, think out loud, and offer a brief answer or an agreed follow-up later.
• If time is tight: jump to the essential conclusions and offer resources for expansion afterward.

During the presentation: play to win, not to not lose

The goal is to connect, not recite. The audience is on your side if you guide them with clarity and calm.

• Start slower than feels natural; adrenaline speeds up your perception.
• Use pauses as a tool, not as a sign of doubt.
• Support ideas with open, steady gestures; avoid hiding your hands.
• Look in triangles: left, center, right, to include everyone.
• Speak to one person at a time, change your anchor point each sentence or idea.
• Look for micro-signals of understanding: nods, looks; adjust your pace if you see confusion.

After: consolidate progress

Closing the cycle trains your brain not to associate the stage with threat. Each exposure is an investment.

• Brief decompression: three long breaths and a short walk.
• Objective log: write down 3 things that worked, 1 concrete improvement, and one piece of evidence that the monster stayed small.
• Reinforcement: share a learning with someone; putting it into words cements the progress.

When to seek additional support

If anxiety blocks you recurrently or keeps you from opportunities, add allies. It's not surrendering; it's professionalizing your preparation.

• Signs: repeated panic attacks, persistent avoidance, severe insomnia, excessive use of sedatives or alcohol.
• Helpful supports: public-speaking skills training, cognitive behavioral therapy, gradual exposure techniques, targeted coaching.
• Goal: reduce reactivity and expand your toolbox, not eliminate all activation.

2-minute mini-plan right before going on

• Exhale slowly 3 times to downshift.
• Quick grounding: feel the weight in your feet and the contact of your hands.
• Repeat your opening line under your breath and your operational mantra.
• Physical anchor: discreet gesture associated with calm.
• Remember your goal in one line: “Deliver X to this audience”.
• Soft smile, lift your chest, take the first step with confidence.

The monster will probably come to every performance. It doesn't need to disappear for you to shine. If you treat it like a clumsy helper — you thank it for the warning, give it small tasks, and then set it aside — you take back the helm. With practice, realistic preparation, and clear rituals, anticipation stops being an abyss and becomes a launchpad.