Is it possible to lie? The coherence between verbal and nonverbal communication.

The Lying Challenge: Why is it Almost Impossible to Pretend?

The question of whether it is possible to lie or fake convincingly is central to the study of nonverbal communication. The answer is that it is almost impossible to achieve perfection.

The main reason is the enormous number of small gestures and micro-signals that our body emits unconsciously and that are directly linked to our real emotions.

Signals such as a slight sweating of the forehead, the dilation or contraction of the pupils, a nervous twitch or the subtle raising of an eyebrow are automatic reactions that escape our conscious control.

Trying to coordinate all these elements to project an emotion that we do not feel is a titanic task; it is very likely that some telltale gesture escapes us and contradicts the message we are trying to convey verbally or with a forced facial expression, such as an insincere smile.

The Internal Detector: How Our Brain Perceives Incoherence

The human brain has a sophisticated mechanism that unconsciously detects contradictions between different communication channels.

Surely you have experienced that feeling, when talking to someone, that "something doesn't add up" or that you get the impression that he or she is lying to you, even if you can't explain exactly why.

That intuition is, in reality, your brain picking up an inconsistency between verbal and non-verbal language.

It is important to clarify that this detection of an inconsistency does not always mean that the person is lying.

Sometimes, it may simply give away that they are nervous, and that nervousness manifests itself through a tic that does not match the smile they are trying to show.

In either case, our brain picks up on the misalignment, which generates distrust and weakens the credibility of the message.

The Detection Game: Sender's Skill vs. Receiver's Perception

Ultimately, the likelihood of a deception being successful depends on two crucial factors.

On the one hand, on the ability of the person faking to conceal each and every one of his or her telltale gestures, a task, as we have seen, extremely difficult.

On the other hand, and equally important, it depends on the receiver's ability to read and interpret these gestures.

Although our brain can pick up on contradictions unconsciously, the real power lies in developing the ability to consciously identify what each signal means.

Learning to recognize these cues gives us an enormous advantage in communication, allowing us to obtain a much deeper and more truthful layer of information than mere words can provide.

Coherence as a Seal of Authenticity

The big conclusion is that non-verbal communication is a reflection of our internal state.

Therefore, the key to effective communication does not lie in learning to pretend, but in learning to communicate with our body in the same way we do with words, always seeking coherence between both languages.

A confident body posture, an appropriate facial expression, an honest look and gestures that accompany our speech in a natural way are what transmit confidence, serenity and conviction.

When we achieve this alignment, our communication becomes authentic and powerful, and the possibility of being misinterpreted or generating mistrust decreases dramatically.

Summary

The question of whether it is possible to lie convincingly is central to nonverbal communication, and the answer is that it is almost impossible. The reason is the large number of micro-signals that our body unconsciously emits.

The human brain has a sophisticated mechanism that unconsciously detects contradictions between different communication channels. Surely you have experienced that feeling that "something doesn't add up" when talking to someone.

Ultimately, whether a deception is successful depends on two factors. On the one hand, on the ability of the person pretending to hide his or her gestures, and on the other hand, on the receiver's ability to read them.