Be understanding with others

The tendency to overinterpret other people's intentions

Understanding is a fundamental facet of empathy.

We often have a tendency to overinterpret other people's intentions, usually in a negative way and based on mistrust.

Empathy as a tool for connecting, not for mind-reading

Emotional intelligence invites us to change this habit. We must use our empathy to connect, not to mind-read.

We are not capable of knowing with certainty what another person is thinking. Therefore, the wisest attitude is to always maintain an understanding stance.

The importance of maintaining an understanding attitude by default

This means giving others the benefit of the doubt. It means assuming that, in general, people act with the best possible intentions.

This attitude isn't naive; it's a conscious choice that improves our relationships.

The Principle of 'Err on Being Overly Understanding, Not on Being Mistrustful'

There's a useful principle: if we ever have to err in judging someone, let it be on the basis of being overly understanding, not on being mistrustful.

It's better to err on the side of kindness than on the side of cynicism. This attitude allows us to build relationships based on trust and frees us from the weariness of always being on the defensive.

Summary

We often fall into the trap of over-interpreting other people's intentions, projecting our insecurities and mistrust onto them. This damages the quality of our personal relationships.

Empathy should be a tool for connecting from a place of understanding, not for guessing thoughts. Adopting an open attitude helps us live together with fewer misjudgments and more harmony.

It's better to err on the side of overtrust than on the side of mistrust, as an understanding stance strengthens bonds and reduces everyday emotional conflict.