The language metamodel

Richard Bandler and John Grinder, considered the fathers of Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP), were the ones who conceptualized what we know as the language metamodel. Influenced in turn by the transformational grammar work of Noam Chomsky's school. In this way we have a guide where behavior in communication and language can be modeled. It is one of the bases of NLP.

It can be used as a form of self-analysis, to combat negative thoughts, stress and anxiety. To try to be as objective as possible and to be fairer to others and to oneself. If we are in the role of interested interlocutor, coach, advisor, teacher, boss or leader where understanding these structures is paramount, we should approach with respect and empathy. A relationship of trust (rapport) must always be created between the parties before using this tool.

Importance of the language metamodel

Verbal language is of utmost importance to achieve understanding. To convey what we want clearly, to understand what we are being told and to make sure that our message gets through. But for this we must understand how our experiences are transformed into words.

The language metamodel allows us to contrast what happens between the deep structure and the surface structure of language in a person. It allows us to see what is missing, to analyze what the person says, what they don't say and how they say it in order to challenge their patterns.

This is accomplished by probing through pointed questions. These questions bring to light the limitations, deficiencies and inconsistencies that exist within the person in order to revise and expand their map of the world.

Deep and superficial structures

The deep structure is the mostly unconscious part, where we perceive everything that surrounds us through our senses. They are rich and complete experiences that we process as a whole, according to the capacity of our body and mind. The superficial structure, is the one we use once we put our experiences into words (both our internal and external speech). It is an activity in which we apply a series of conscious and unconscious filters to express ourselves.

Once the information passes from one structure to another it inevitably undergoes modifications. And in the end it shows us the way in which people live their reality based on what they decide to share, reject, omit or even unconsciously repress.

Language violations

These modifications that occur when converting experiences into words are called language violations. They are common processes in our lives and to some extent facilitate communication. But they can also hinder communication. These processes occur when we eliminate or omit information, distort it or when we generalize.

The interesting thing is that it has a direct impact on our behavior, it is not something we say only for the rest of the world, it is our interpretation of the facts and we end up limited by them.

Metamodel categories

The solution provided by this metamodel is precisely to retrace the path towards the original experience that is hidden in the deep structure of our mind. Inquiring into the why, how, when and who. Through specific questions for each case we can obtain the omitted information and understand what is happening. It is beneficial for us and for the person as well, as it forces them to question and revise their perspective of what is happening. We call this type of inquiry language challenges.

There are three categories that contain the patterns that need to be challenged. The advantage of this model is that it provides the guidelines for doing so. Here is a summary:

• ELIMINATION OR OMISSION: It is impractical to recount every detail of everything that happens to us, so we tend to select the part we think is relevant and omit the rest. We suppress this information depending on our sense of what is important, our beliefs or because we do not notice it.
• Simple elimination: we leave out the part of the context or important information that can give a complete and precise meaning. The objective is to look for that specific missing information.
• Examples: I'm a little anxious. We have lost time. I feel tired.
• Omission for lack of reference: You don't know who or what specifically you are talking about. The goal is for you to clarify what or whom you are referring to. Know the subject.
• Examples: I'm fed up with you. They want to finish me off. You should help me. Because of what happened, he won't talk now.

  Without verb specification: The verb is omitted or the verbs used do not help to clarify the meaning. It is assumed that the other person knows what we are talking about. The goal is to define the action, to find out specifically what information is missing.

• Examples: They're cheating on me. I'm going to do it alone. She told me.
• Comparative suppression: A comparison is made but the parameter is not known. Adjectives such as better, worse, greater, lesser, superior, inferior, easy, difficult, etc. are used. The goal is to find out the benchmark, with respect to what or whom the comparison is being made and to what limitations it leads.
• Examples: You are the worst. I'm very complicated. It's a difficult decision. I made the biggest fool of myself.
• DISTORTIONS: Is when the person changes elements of what happened, adds data or simplifies them. They are wrong interpretations that can generate conflicts or negative attitudes.
• Cause-effect: It relates an event where there is an external cause (not specified) that does something concrete to the person (effect) who sometimes remains as a victim. The objective is to find the relationship between the stimulus and the response, if any. In what specific way does the event affect the person?
• Examples: I get upset when I see what Maria does. Matthew makes me cry. It makes me sad the way they look at me.
• Nominalizations: They focus on the noun, that is, on the fact. The experience is treated as something that has already happened when in fact it is in process. They are usually abstract nouns that can have different meanings depending on the person. The objective would be to find out what that noun means to that person. And use the verb form to bring the experience into the present. What does that noun mean to the person? What does he or she think is happening? What specifically does he or she need to do?
• Example: I don't like it when he looks at me like that. I don't feel respected.
• Mind reading: A statement that is made without evidence, based only on what is assumed from the other person's inner experience. What he or she is feeling, thinking, needing or wha