Rediscovering identity to escape emotional suffering

Exploring how a person perceives themselves can mark a turning point in their emotional change process.

Often, without realizing it, people adopt ideas as truths that are actually reflections of temporary moods.

Over time, these states become labels that limit personal development.

It is therefore essential to learn to distinguish between what one feels at certain moments and what one truly is at the core of one's being.

Visualize desirable qualities

A valuable strategy for beginning this change is to imagine what personal qualities you consider ideal.

Rather than thinking about specific people, it is helpful to focus on characteristics that you want to incorporate or strengthen in your life.

These may include firmness, serenity, open-mindedness, compassion, or enthusiasm, among many others.

When someone clearly identifies these values, they begin to become aware of where they want to go.

This clarity does not require perfection or having everything figured out, but simply recognizing which aspects you want to enhance as part of your personal growth.

Explore your inner identity

Another fundamental step is to stop and think honestly: how do I define myself? This question is not looking for answers related to occupations or daily tasks, but to your personal essence.

This reflection is often clouded by emotional distress. Statements such as “I'm useless” or “I always ruin everything” are not personality traits, but judgments generated by pain.

It is important to separate the essential “I” from passing emotional states.

When you dig deeper beyond the discomfort, authentic qualities that have been forgotten often emerge: the desire to contribute, honesty, imagination, the ability to love or adapt. Recognizing these qualities is the first step in strengthening them.

Distinguish between being and doing

In everyday life, many people tend to define themselves by their occupation or the roles they play in their environment.

Phrases such as “I am a carpenter,” “I am a mother,” or “I am a student” describe important functions, but they do not exhaust the meaning of being.

A practical exercise is to formulate sentences that begin with “I am someone who...” and complete them with profound personal aspects, such as “I am someone who learns from mistakes” or “I am someone who values tranquility.”

This allows us to connect with aspects of our identity that go beyond what we do and do not depend on external circumstances.

Transforming one's view of oneself

Identity is dynamic. It is constructed from decisions, experiences, and the interpretations given to them.

If someone has been burdened with the idea that their identity is linked to suffering, it is possible to begin to construct a kinder vision, more consistent with the values they wish to embody.

Redefining oneself from a conscious and flexible place allows one to leave rigid labels behind and move toward a more authentic and healthy way of life.