Building Internal vs. External Security

The Fragility of External Security

When we cling to an external source in our search for security, such as a relationship or a job, we expose ourselves to a very great risk.

If that person who supports us abandons us or dies, our entire world can fall apart, leaving us with a truly impressive level of stress.

The security that depended on something or someone external completely vanishes, and we are left not knowing what to do with ourselves, completely lost and disoriented.

In the same way, if the job that gives us financial stability disappears tomorrow, this does not necessarily mean the end of our lives if we do not depend on it.

Clinging to external sources is a very risky strategy, because these can change or disappear at any moment, leaving us in a position of extreme vulnerability and fear.

The Path to Internal Security: Self-Knowledge

The true solution to this vulnerability is to satisfy our need of security from the inside out, through a deep process of development and self-knowledge.

This path involves beginning to discover who we truly are and what capabilities, skills, talents, and intelligence we truly possess.

Inner security is born when you are genuinely sure of who you are and recognize that you have good things within you, without needing validation from the outside.

This is the type of security we seek to satisfy in the long run, one that does not depend on changing circumstances, but on our own solid inner strength.

The Fruits of Inner Strength

When you are sure of your own abilities, you no longer need to desperately search for security around you, because you are capable of generating it for yourself in any situation.

You can have a partner and walk together, but if that person leaves, you are able to continue standing on your own two feet without collapsing.

You do not need to lean on anyone else or anything external to be able to maintain your balance, since that your main support comes from your own well-built interior.

If you lose your job, you don't panic because you know you can look for another option, invent a new business, or create a thousand different things thanks to your ingenuity.

There is a big difference between depending on others and trusting yourself, and it is this trust that allows us to navigate life with much less anxiety.

A Final Warning: The Danger of the Comfort Zone

We must be very careful because sometimes, in our intense search to feel safe, we can end up permanently trapped in our comfort zone.

If we remain stuck in this safe zone to avoid any type of risk, we will not be able to feel free nor will we be able to act in a completely authentic way.

You cannot have both security based on the fear of change and the freedom to be who you really are, as they are two completely incompatible states.

Clinging to false external security often involves sacrificing other values fundamental, such as freedom or authenticity, which in the long run also generates stress.