The Art of Setting Boundaries to Protect Your Peace

Boundaries as an Act of Self-Care

Learning to set healthy boundaries is not an act of selfishness, but one of the most important forms of self-care.

Setting clear boundaries is an essential function of our Loving Parent, who seeks to protect our vulnerable inner child.

For a person with anxiety, this skill is essential to creating an environment of safety and peace of mind.

Anxiety and the Fear of Setting Boundaries

Often, people with anxiety have great difficulty saying "no" because of a deep fear of conflict.

We fear that if we set a boundary, the other person will get angry, reject us, or stop loving us altogether.

This difficulty in setting boundaries leads us to accept situations that harm us, thus increasing our anxiety levels.

We allow others to invade our personal and emotional space, which leaves us feeling resentful and powerless.

Listening to the Need for a Boundary

The signal that you need to set a boundary comes directly from your inner child, which is your emotional center.

When you feel that someone is not treating you well or is invading your space, it is your inner child asking for protection.

Your Loving Parent is supposed to listen to this signal and communicate that need in a calm and rational way.

If this need is ignored, your inner child will feel abandoned and could sabotage your efforts as a form of protest.

The Boundary as a Conscious Decision

Setting a boundary is, in essence, an act of decision that falls perfectly within the art of deciding about your life.

It is the conscious decision to prioritize your own well-being and peace of mind over the approval of others.

By setting a boundary, you are taking control of the situation and ceasing to be a victim of circumstances.

It's one of the most powerful ways to show yourself that you value yourself and that your needs are important.

A Practical Tool for Setting a Boundary

If you find yourself in a difficult situation and don't know how to respond, you can use a phrase to create space.

You can calmly say, "Thank you for telling me that. I'm going to take some time so I can think about this."

This response isn't agg