Active Listening

In communication, there is a crucial difference between hearing and listening.

Hearing is a passive, physiological process: sound waves reach our ears.

Listening, on the other hand, is an active, conscious skill that involves interpreting, understanding, and responding to the other person's message.

In a conflict, active listening is one of the most powerful tools for calming emotions and finding a solution.

It is a skill that is practiced and refined over time and involves paying full attention not only to what is being said, but also to how it is being said.

Active listening requires being available in the present moment, letting go of distractions, judgments, and personal concerns.

Most people, when listening, are more concerned with formulating their own response or being right than with understanding the other person.

This "listening to respond" pattern is a major obstacle in communication and problem-solving conflicts.

Active listening, on the other hand, involves a conscious effort to understand the other person's perspective with all five senses, paying attention to verbal and nonverbal communication, such as tone of voice, body language, and facial expression.

To demonstrate that you are actively listening, there are several practical techniques: Paraphrasing: Repeating back in your own words what you think the other person said is an excellent way to confirm understanding and show that you have processed the information.

Phrases such as, "So, if I understand you correctly, what you're worried about is..." or "What you're telling me is that..." demonstrate genuine interest and allow the other person to correct any misunderstandings.

Open-ended questions: Rather than asking questions that can be answered with a "yes" or "no," open-ended questions invite the client to elaborate and delve deeper into their perspective.

Questions such as, "How did that make you feel?" or "What else happened?" They open up dialogue and help uncover the underlying causes of the problem.

Reflecting emotions: Naming the emotion you perceive in the other person validates their feelings and makes them feel understood on a deeper level.

Phrases like, "You seem to be frustrated with this situation" or "I detect some anger in your tone" lower their guard and reduce tension because they feel seen and heard.

Active listening is a vital skill that transforms a confrontation into a resolution conversation.

By making the other person feel heard, you build a foundation of respect and trust that makes it easier to find a mutually beneficial solution.

Summary

There is a crucial difference between hearing and listening. Hearing is a physiological process, while active listening is a conscious skill that involves understanding and responding.

Active listening requires letting go of distractions and the desire to be right. This involves an effort to understand the other's perspective by paying attention to both verbal and nonverbal input.

This can be demonstrated through paraphrasing, repeating the other's ideas to confirm understanding. Open-ended questions are also used to invite the client to elaborate.