Assertive Technique III: The [Broken Record] to maintain your stance

The Challenge of Standing Firm in the Face of Pressure

On many occasions, we find ourselves in situations where we have a clear idea of what we want or need, but we anticipate that when we communicate it, others will try to manipulate, dissuade or object.

The fear that our decision will generate a conflict often leads us to justify ourselves excessively, to end up arguing or, even worse, to not express correctly what we want, which deteriorates communication.

The "broken record" technique is an assertive communication tool designed precisely for these moments, allowing us to maintain our position firmly and calmly, without yielding to external pressure and without the need to enter into a destructive confrontation.

The Essence of the Technique: Repeating the Key Message

The first step in applying this technique is to be absolutely clear about the message we want to convey.

It is crucial to define our objective in a short and precise sentence, as lack of clarity only opens the door to more objections and arguments.

Once we have this core message, the technique consists of repeating it over and over again, like a broken record, every time our interlocutor tries to divert us from the topic or pressure us to change our mind.

The key to the success of this tool lies in always maintaining an open attitude, a relaxed body posture and a friendly, calm tone of voice, even accompanying our repetition with a smile.

A Practical Example: The Solo Journey

Let's imagine you have decided that you need to go on vacation alone, but you know that your family or partner will try to talk you out of it.

Your key message, clear and concise, would be: "This time, I've decided to go on vacation alone".

When presented with the first objection ("But we always go together"), your response, while remaining calm, would be: "I understand what you are saying and I appreciate it, but this time I have decided to go on vacation alone".

If they insist with another argument ("It's not safe for you to go alone"), your response remains the same: "I appreciate your concern, but this time I've decided to go on vacation alone."

By sticking to your position in a calm and repetitive manner, the other person will eventually give up when they see that they cannot change your decision, thus avoiding further conflict and allowing you to achieve your goal.

Wearing Down the Opponent Without Exhausting Yourself: The "Disco Rayed" Advantage

The great advantage of this technique is that it shifts the attrition to our interlocutor. While he or she strives to find new arguments and reasons to convince you, you stay in the same position without the need to counter-argue, which involves no mental effort.

This calm persistence "extinguishes the flame" of the possible conflict before it is ignited. The "broken record" is a way of resolving conflicts before they start.

It allows you to achieve your goals and express your needs without falling into manipulation or giving in to objections, simply because you are clear about what you want and communicate it with calm and constant assertiveness.

Summary

The "broken record" technique is an assertive communication tool designed to hold our position firmly and calmly. It allows us not to give in to external pressure without the need to enter into a destructive confrontation.

The first step in applying this technique is to be absolutely clear about the message we want to convey, summarizing it in a short, precise sentence. The technique consists of repeating this message over and over again.

The great advantage of this technique is that it shifts the wear and tear towards our interlocutor. While the other person is trying to find new arguments, you stay in the same position without the need to counter-argue.