Keys to Improving Empathy and Overcoming Personal Barriers

External Tools to Foster Connection

To improve empathy, it is essential to apply a series of conscious techniques during communication.

First, we must practice active listening, paying attention not only to what the other person says, but also to how they say it.

This involves being attentive to the full range of nonverbal cues: their body posture, tone of voice, gaze and the micro-expressions on their face.

Being sensitive and receptive to their views and opinions, even if they differ from our own, is crucial to creating a space of trust.

The use of genuine empathetic expressions, such as "I understand how you feel" or "I can tell this is important to you," validates the other person's experience and makes them feel understood.

To achieve this, it is essential to stop judging, not to give premature solutions and, for a few moments, to forget about ourselves to focus completely on the other person, understanding that sometimes they just need understanding and not to be told what to do.

The Internal Barrier: Lack of Empathy for Self

Often, when we experience difficulty practicing empathy or active listening, the root cause is not in the other person, but in ourselves.

If we struggle to understand and connect with others, it is a clear indicator that we need to turn our gaze inward.

To improve empathy towards others, the previous and indispensable step is to become aware of what we feel, of our own emotions and feelings.

If we have difficulty identifying the emotion of another person, it is very likely that we lack empathy with ourselves and are unaware of our own inner world.

If we are not able to recognize and accept our own emotions, it will be practically impossible for us to put ourselves in the other person's place and truly understand their experience.

The Other as a Mirror: What You Reject in Others Speaks of You

Communication often functions as a mirror that reflects aspects of ourselves that we have not integrated.

If there is something in the other person that we reject "an emotion, a feeling, or an experience," it is most likely something that we are also rejecting within ourselves.

If you judge someone harshly for an attitude, ask yourself if it is not a judgment you have previously applied to yourself.

In the same way, if you do not accept the other person as he or she is, it is possible that deep down there is a lack of acceptance of yourself.

Therefore, when you find yourself having difficulty empathizing, use that interaction as an opportunity for self-knowledge.

Ask yourself: what is it that this person is showing me that I am rejecting within myself? This exercise in introspection is one of the most powerful keys to dismantling the barriers that prevent you from genuinely connecting with others.

Summary

To improve empathy, it is essential to apply a series of conscious techniques during communication. We must practice active listening, paying attention not only to what is said, but also to nonverbal cues.

Often, when we experience difficulties in practicing empathy, the root cause is not in the other person, but in ourselves. If we find it difficult to connect, it is an indicator that we need to look inward.

Communication functions as a mirror that reflects aspects of ourselves that we have not integrated. If there is something in the other person that we reject, it is most likely something that we are also rejecting within ourselves.