The Problem of Honesty and Consistency

Honesty is the cornerstone of any strong relationship.

When a person is dishonest, whether out of fear of confrontation, a desire to manage others' image of them, or for any other reason, it leads to inconsistent communication.

This lack of consistency between what is said and what is done erodes trust, which is the foundation of any healthy relationship.

Honesty and Consistency

Trust and Consistency: Trust in a relationship is built over time as a person's actions align with their words.

A person who is honest and consistent is seen as predictable and reliable.

Conversely, a person who says one thing and does another is seen as unreliable, and over time, distrust takes over the relationship.

Fear of Confrontation: Often, people are not honest because they fear confrontation.

They lie to themselves and to others to avoid an argument or to get something they want.

However, as seen, the truth always eventually comes out, and the consequence of this dishonesty is a much larger and more destructive conflict.

Authenticity and Conflict: Honesty, although it can sometimes generate short-term conflict, is the only way to build an authentic relationship.

Being honest with others is a way to be honest with yourself.

Inconsistency and Unreliability

Inconsistency in communication can manifest itself in a variety of ways.

A person may promise something in a moment of enthusiasm, but then fail to deliver.

Or they may engage in behavior that doesn't align with what they say they value.

In all of these cases, inconsistency breeds a lack of reliability.

The other person, unable to trust the other's word, becomes distrustful and cautious, making co