Merrill and Reid's Social Styles Model

The social styles model, developed by David Merrill and Roger Reid, provides a theoretical framework for understanding and classifying interpersonal behaviors.

This model is based on the idea that the way we interact with others is not governed by depth psychology, but by the "self" we show to the world in social situations.

The key to conflict management is to understand these styles and how they influence our interactions.

The model is built on two main axes that, when combined, form four distinct quadrants, each representing a social style.

The two axes of the model

Assertiveness Axis: The assertiveness axis measures how assertive a person tends to be in asserting himself or asserting his ideas.

Asking-oriented: At one end of the spectrum are people who prefer to ask questions to guide the conversation and obtain information.

They are more indirect in their approach and seek to generate consensus through inquiry.

Tell-oriented: At the other end of the spectrum are people who prefer to give orders or express their opinions directly.

They are more direct, prefer a more forceful form of communication and focus on making things happen.

Responsiveness Axis

Responsiveness refers to how a person expresses emotions and relates to others.

Showing Emotions (Emote): At one extreme are people who show their emotions openly and visibly.

They are more expressive and tend to be more relationally oriented.

Controlling Emotions (Control): At the other extreme are people who tend to control or suppress their emotions.

They focus more on the task and logic than on feelings.

The four social styles

The combination of these two axes creates the four social styles that, according to Merrill and Reid, describe people's behavior in the workplace and in other social interactions.

Driving: Combines high assertiveness (telling) with low responsiveness (controlling emotions).

They are very results and efficiency oriented people.

At their best, they are an asset to the organization, as they focus on the "what" and "when" of a task.

However, their directness and focus on control can damage relationships.

Expressive: Combines high assertiveness (telling) with high responsiveness (showing emotions).

They are enthusiastic and charismatic people who enjoy social interaction and like to work in teams.

They are impatient and like action, but can appear superficial at times.

Affable (Amiable): Combines low assertiveness (asking questions) with high responsiveness (showing emotions).

They value group harmony and care about the "who" and "why" of things.

They tend to avoid conflict in order to keep the peace, which puts them in the opposite position to drivers.

Analytical: Combines low assertiveness (questioning) with low responsiveness (controlling emotions).

They are interested in the details and the "how" of a task, seeking precision above all else.

They may clash with expressives, who are quicker and less interested in details.

Understanding these styles helps us to predict how people will behave in conflict situations and to adapt our own communication to be more effective and respectful.

Summary

This model classifies interpersonal behaviors into four styles, based on how we interact socially. It is built on two main axes: assertiveness and emotional responsiveness.

The Assertiveness axis measures whether a person tends to impose his or her ideas directly ("telling") or whether he or she prefers to guide the conversation with questions ("asking").

The Responsiveness axis refers to whether a person shows his or her emotions openly or whether he or she tends to control them, focusing more on logic and tasks.