Useless Pattern 3. Selectively Focusing on the Negative

The Habit of Filtering Reality

Another completely useless thinking pattern is our tendency to selectively focus only on the bad things about a person, a job, or a situation.

Many times, we find ourselves concentrating only on those things that make us uncomfortable or upset us, completely ignoring everything else around us.

This mental filter causes us to lose perspective, since we only pay attention to the negative aspects, regardless of how many positive elements may exist at the same time.

Thus, our vision of the world becomes distorted, since we give disproportionate weight to the defects while completely rendering invisible the virtues or advantages.

The Spiral of Negativity and Stress

When you focus exclusively on the negatives of something or someone, you inevitably stop appreciating the full value of the situation.

This limited focus leads us to a state of permanent discomfort, which, over time, becomes a constant source of stress and malaise.

Furthermore, any small negative detail that previously had no importance, we begin to see it increasingly larger, magnifying its impact on our mind and emotions.

Thus, a small complaint from our partner or a request from our boss becomes a recurring problem that generates immense frustration.

We wonder how it is possible to feel good if our attention is focused only on the bad things about our family, our work or our partner.

The Inability to Enjoy Life

If we focus solely and exclusively on the things that are bad, or that from our perspective are negative, we will not be able to enjoy the rest.

This pattern of thinking robs us of the ability to enjoy the rest of the life we could live, since our mind always finds something to complain about.

Even if a situation may be very complicated, there always has to be something positive, since it is impossible that everything is complete and utter crap.

By losing the value of the good things by paying attention only to the bad, we condemn ourselves to an existence of eternal frustration, anguish, and anxiety.

The Antidote: The Conscious Search for the Positive

The solution to this pattern is to stop focusing solely and exclusively on the negative and start actively looking for the good in every situation.

You can recognize what you don't like or what doesn't seem right to you, but immediately afterward you must ask yourself what positive things you can take away from that experience.

Even if you find yourself in a job that isn't the most satisfying, you can always find something good, like the camaraderie you have with your colleagues.

If right now you can't get out of where you are, at least discover something that allows you to live it in the most enjoyable way.

Even if your problems are significant, there has to be something positive in your life, and actively seeking it is the key to breaking with this cycle of negativity.