How the Conflict Escalates

Conflicts rarely arise out of nowhere; They are usually the result of a gradual escalation process that begins with small frictions and intensifies over time.

Often, what triggers an argument is not the problem itself, but a series of underlying factors that have been accumulating and, at a given moment, end up boiling over.

Understanding this escalation process is crucial to detect it in time and be able to defuse it before it becomes destructive.

Emotional Hijacking and Ego Battles

One of the main reasons why conflicts escalate is what is known as "emotional hijacking."

This occurs when emotions override a person's ability to think rationally, activating the "fight or flight" response.

At that point, the argument no longer revolves around the original topic, but becomes a defense of pride or identity.

This emotional hijacking often goes hand in hand with "ego battles," where the main objective stops being solving the problem and becomes winning the argument.

Insecurity is the driving force behind these battles, as the person clings to their position to protect their worth or intelligence, even if deep down they know they are wrong.

Misunderstandings and Assumptions

The lack of clear and effective communication is one of the factors that most fuel the escalation of conflict.

Misunderstandings arise not only from what is said, but also from the tone, body language, or silences.

In the digital world, for example, a neutral message can be interpreted as passive-aggressive, which unnecessarily increases tension.

When people assume bad intentions behind every gesture or action, filling in the information gaps with negative assumptions, the conflict escalates quickly.

If someone doesn't respond to an email quickly, it may be thought that they are ignoring us, and this assumption, which can be completely false, it has already planted the seeds for conflict.

Unresolved Past Grievances

Conflicts also escalate because of "unresolved past grievances."

These are old wounds that haven't fully healed and, although they may seem behind us, resurface at any opportunity to influence the present.

These unresolved emotions seep into the current situation, causing us to overreact to events that, objectively, might not be that serious.

Recognizing when a reaction is more tied to the past than the present is an essential step in handling things more maturely.

By understanding how this tension builds, we can not only avoid unnecessary fights, but also identify the deeper dynamics at play.

Summary

Conflicts rarely arise out of nowhere; they are the result of a gradual escalation process. The main reason is "emotional hijacking," where emotions override reason.

This manifests itself in "ego battles" where the goal is to win at all costs, not solve the problem. Misunderstandings and assumptions filled with malicious intent also play a role.

Conflicts also escalate due to "unresolved past grievances." These old wounds resurface and cause overreactions to minor events.