The art of persuasion

Despite our efforts and the application of various techniques, some children's behavior may not improve quickly.

To achieve lasting transformation, we can use the art of persuasion to complement what we have already learned.

It is important to keep in mind that "persuading" does not imply tricking the child or forcing him or her to accept our idea. The objective is to direct stubbornness toward more profitable goals. It is about changing the child's mind by convincing him or her of the benefits to be gained.

Persuasion.

When persuading, characteristics such as empathy, knowledge, confidence, clarity and flexibility are emphasized. A persuasive person must be able to:

• Put themselves in the place of others.

• Have a great command of the subject in question.

• Be coherent.

• Communicate confidently and effectively.

• Know how to adapt and change their course of action if necessary.

Robert Cialdini, a recognized expert in psychology, establishes a series of basic principles to consider:

• Approval: because of their vulnerability, children seek recognition from those they admire. What they are told can significantly influence the way they think and act.

• Authority: by earning respect and demonstrating our knowledge in a specific area, we can inspire others to follow advice without protest.

• Empathy: by understanding the right reasons and not imposing your authority, you can make them understand your decisions and feel comfortable with them.

• Reciprocity: when you help your child, you can encourage them to return the favor in the future.

Reciprocity.

Reciprocity can be an effective tool for persuading your children. Helping them in situations that go beyond your duties as a parent can generate gratitude. For example, helping them with their homework when they are sick.

This fosters a positive attitude and strengthens the parent-child bond. At that point, they will stop obeying you simply because you are the parent and start doing it because they believe you deserve it.

Options.

It's easy to show your child that there are other alternatives. You only have to offer him two options to choose from, as we mentioned in the previous chapter. For example, if he is upset about something and you need to solve the problem quickly, you could say, "Would you rather talk now or after you take a bath?" This way, he can choose one of the two options. Always keeping in mind the obligation you intend to fulfill, in this case taking a bath.

To achieve greater protagonism on his part, you can ask hi