Mindfulness and Self-Compassion

Self-Criticism as a Destructive Habit

Many patients with depression or anxiety have a brutally critical internal dialogue ("I'm stupid," "I'm no good"). They mistakenly believe that this harshness is necessary to motivate or correct themselves.

The self-compassion component in Mindfulness seeks to change this relationship with oneself.

Self-compassion is defined not as pity or indulgence, but as treating oneself with the same kindness, care and support that one would offer to a good friend or loved one who is suffering or has made a mistake.

The Coaching Exercise

To dismantle the belief that criticism works, the "Coach" exercise is used. The patient is asked to imagine two sports coaches.

The first (Critical) shouts, insults and humiliates at every mistake ("You're useless, run more!").

The second (Compassionate) corrects but encourages, validates the effort and offers strategies for improvement ("I saw you made an effort, let's correct the posture for the next one").

The patient is asked, "With which coach would you feel more motivated, less anxious and perform better in the long run?".

Invariably they choose the compassionate one, which serves as a basis for beginning to change their own "inner coach."

Compassionate Voice Practice

The intervention involves actively coaching a new inner voice. When the patient notices that they are suffering or have failed (Mindfulness: "I am feeling shame"), instead of attacking themselves, they are instructed to offer words of encouragement to themselves.

If you have failed at a task, instead of "I'm a mess," you practice saying, "This is hard and it's normal to make mistakes; I'm learning and will try again."

This change reduces the internal threat and activates the brain's calm and safety system, facilitating emotional recovery and resilience.

Summary