Avoid trigger words and common mistakes

In a sensitive conversation, the use of certain words and phrases can quickly escalate tension and derail any attempts at resolution.

For effective and constructive communication, it is vital to identify and avoid these common mistakes.

Trigger words

"Always" and "never": These are two of the most damaging words in an argument.

When you tell someone "You always do this" or "You never do that," you are generalizing and overriding their ability to change.

These words provoke an immediate defensive reaction, as the person will feel that they are not being judged for a specific act, but for their character, making a productive conversation nearly impossible.

"But:" The use of "but" after a positive statement can completely invalidate what has been said.

For example, if you say to a colleague, "I think you bring great value to the team, but you have not fulfilled your responsibilities," the "but" causes the value you attributed to him or her to be forgotten, and the focus shifts to the noncompliance.

To avoid this effect, it is better to use "and" or split the feedback into two separate parts.

Common communication mistakes

Interrupting and talking too much: In a difficult conversation, it is natural to want it to end as quickly as possible.

However, rushing or interrupting the other person can leave the problem unresolved.

Give the other person a chance to process what has been said and respond. The person most comfortable with silence is usually the one most in control of the conversation.

Assumptions and lack of listening: One of the most serious mistakes is to assume the intentions of others without first listening to them.

It is vital to focus on the problem, not the person.

By actively listening and seeking the other person's perspective, you can avoid the biases and misinterpretations that often lead to conflict.

By avoiding these traps and adopting a more respectful communication style, it is possible to prevent c