Conflict escalation

Conflict escalation is a process from the first sign of tension to full-blown confrontation.

Understanding the stages of this process is critical to intervene early and avoid a destructive outcome.

Like a boomerang that is thrown and comes back, conflict follows a predictable trajectory, beginning in harmony and ending in aggression.

The stages of escalation

The path to full confrontation follows a series of stages that can be identified through changes in behavior and communication.

Agreement and concord: In this initial stage, there is no conflict.

Relationships are harmonious and communication is open and respectful.

However, even at this point, there may be latent tensions that, if not addressed, can trigger escalation.

Irritation: Concord begins to crack and a simple irritation or mild disagreement begins to take shape.

This stage is characterized by a subtle change in behavior, such as a more distant attitude or a different tone of voice.

At this point, the person may begin to avoid eye contact or give short answers.

Resistance: Irritation turns into resistance.

Resistance is not yet a conflict, as it is based on rationality, but the person shows opposition to an idea or situation.

This resistance may be expressed in a polite way, but the tension is palpable.

Frustration and anger: Resistance becomes real conflict when frustration and anger take over.

Emotions escalate and people's behavior becomes more irrational.

This is when you can begin to notice signs of tension in body language.

Abuse and violence: The highest and most dangerous point of escalation is when anger turns into abuse, either verbal or physical.

At this point, the situation is volatile and it is crucial to intervene immediately to prevent the conflict from escalating into violence.

Signs of tension

Early detection of signs of tension is key to de-escalating the conflict before it is too late.

These signals often manifest themselves through body language.

For example, one person may turn away from the other to avoid conflict or lean toward the other aggressively.

Gestures may become more animated or, conversely, more withdrawn.

Touching the face, rubbing the eyes or forehead are signs of discomfort or stress. Touching the neck or playing with clothing shows insecurity and lack of confidence.