The Influence of Family Loyalties

Within every family system operate invisible and powerful forces that shape our decisions, behaviors and, ultimately, our destiny: family loyalties.

These unwritten commitments, passed down from generation to generation, act as a glue that binds the clan together.

However, when these loyalties become rigid and stifling, they can become a burden that impedes personal growth, generating a cycle of obligation and guilt from which it is difficult to escape.

Understanding their function is vital to discern when they nurture us and when they limit us.

Definition of Family Loyalty and its Biological Function

Family loyalty is a deep feeling of solidarity and commitment that unifies the needs and expectations of the family group as a social unit.

From a biological perspective, this loyalty is a key mechanism for the survival of the clan.

Its main function is to establish strong bonds that guarantee protection and mutual support among its members.

When a member is unable to meet a need, another member steps in to protect him, provide resources or care for him, thus ensuring the cohesion and continuity of the system.

In essence, it is an unconscious pact that seeks to keep the family together and safe.

Toxic loyalties: how they block individual development and generate obligation

The problem arises when this loyalty, in principle positive, becomes excessive and transforms into toxic loyalty.

This type of loyalty blocks the person and prevents him from completing his individuation process, that is, from developing as an autonomous individual with a life of his own.

The person stops making decisions for himself and lives according to the expectations and needs of the family, often feeling that he has no right to his own happiness if it conflicts with that of the clan.

These dynamics are sustained by a constant feeling of guilt and obligation.

Emotional ties are never severed in a healthy way, and the person feels perpetually tied and indebted to his family of origin, regardless of his age or circumstances.

This invisible weight prevents him from living his own life freely, as he is always more concerned with his clan's needs than his own, creating a cycle of sacrifice and frustration.

Summary

Family loyalties are invisible forces that shape our decisions. They are unwritten commitments, passed down between generations, that bind the clan together.

Family loyalty is a biological mechanism for clan survival. It ensures protection and mutual support among members.

The problem arises when it becomes a toxic loyalty. It blocks individual development and the person lives in function of the family.