The Competitive and Negotiating style

The Competitive style: win at all costs

The Competitive conflict management style is characterized by a direct and decisive approach, where the person seeks to win at all costs, imposing his or her point of view without considering the other.

This style is self-interested and manifests itself through confrontational behavior, determined to get what it wants regardless of the impact on the relationship.

While this tactic can be useful in emergency situations where speed in decision making is crucial, such as in a security crisis or a tight deadline, its constant use can be detrimental.

The main disadvantage of the competitive style is that it generates resentment and tensions in relationships, and can even break ties.

The other party feels silenced and disrespected, which damages trust and the possibility of future collaborations.

True power does not lie in imposing oneself, but in consciously choosing when to be firm and when to be flexible, since knowledge is power and respect is an invaluable resource.

The Negotiating style: the search for a middle ground

The Negotiating style differs from the competitive style in its practical, results-oriented approach.

People who use this style look for a middle ground in which both parties give a little in order to get something in return.

It is a "give and take" strategy that is very common in situations with limited deadlines or when a quick agreement is needed to move forward, such as in a contract negotiation or in a project with a strict budget.

The main advantage of this style is that it promotes compromise and a sense of balance, preventing one party from feeling completely defeated.

However, its main disadvantage is that it sometimes settles for half-baked solutions that do not solve the root of the problem.

This can lead to conflicts recurring in the future, as the deep-seated needs were not addressed, but merely compromised.

To avoid this, it is important to use the negotiating style consciously, ensuring that the agreement is not only acceptable, but that it also addresses, as far as possible, the underlying interests of the parties.

This allows the agreement to be more sustainable over time and the relationship is not damaged.

Summary

The Avoidant style is characterized by a tendency to escape conflict, ignore it and postpone the inevitable. Those who use it believe that if the problem is not talked about, it will disappear by itself, which is false.

The Complacent style is a submissive attitude where the person gives in easily to keep the peace, often at the expense of his or her own needs. This can lead to resentment and a long-term sense of helplessness.

Both styles are detrimental because the real problem is never addressed. To overcome them, the person needs to learn to be assertive, expressing his or her needs and setting boundaries clearly and respectfully.