Comprehensive Conceptualization of Abuse

Technical Definition: System of Coercive Conduct and Instrumentality

From a technical and expert perspective, we must abandon the reductionist view that limits violence exclusively to physical blows or "visible blood".

We define domestic abuse as a systematic, deliberate and strategic pattern of coercive behaviors designed to establish and perpetuate absolute dominance over a partner or family member.

It is crucial to understand that we are not dealing with a "momentary loss of control" on the part of the abuser or with anger management problems.

On the contrary, violence is instrumental: the perpetrator exercises extremely calculated control over the when, where and how of his actions, ensuring that the harm maximizes his power without necessarily leaving immediate visible traces that facilitate reporting.

This theoretical framework reveals that physical battering is often only a last resort or the tip of the iceberg, underpinned by a submerged base of intimidation and psychological terror. Moreover, violence is configured by both action and omission.

Active violence includes the intentional use of force or speech to degrade.

Violence by omission, or neglect, is defined as the "failure to do" that which is an inherent obligation of the caregiving role (parent, partner), such as failing to provide emotional, educational or nutritional support.

In a power dynamic, this lack of care is an aggression aimed at generating vulnerability and dependence.

Critical Diagnostic Distinction: Conflict vs. Violence

One of the most serious and frequent diagnostic errors in psychosocial and legal practice is the confusion between a conflictual relationship ("bad relationship") and an abusive relationship. This distinction is vital for the safety of the victim.

In a conventional couple conflict, there is a symmetry of power; both parties have the freedom to disagree, argue, shout and even act immaturely without fearing for their physical or psychological integrity.

Conflict is a circumstantial, punctual and bidirectional event. In total contrast, domestic violence is defined by an inherent, permanent and rigid power imbalance.

In this scenario, one partner in the relationship lives conditioned, shaped and silenced by fear of the other's reaction.

While in conflict both can "win" or "lose" arguments, in abuse there is a perpetrator who seeks to override the will of the victim through a unilateral process of strategic domination.

Understanding this distinction is imperative to avoid serious professional negligence, such as referring people who live under terror to family mediation or couple therapy, which revictimizes and puts the violated party in extreme physical danger by exposing them to their aggressor in an environment of supposed equality.

Summary

Technically, abuse is defined as a strategic pattern of coercive behavior. It is not a loss of control, but a system calculated to establish absolute dominance through psychological terror.

Violence is exercised both actively and by omission or neglect. The latter involves failing to provide essential care, generating vulnerability and dependence in order to subjugate the victim.

It is vital to differentiate between conflict and violence. Conflict is punctual and symmetrical, while violence implies a permanent imbalance of power aimed at overriding the will of the victim.