Active listening: listening to understand, not to respond

Active listening: beyond words

Active listening is a fundamental communication skill that goes far beyond simply hearing what the other person says.

It is a three-part process: understanding the message, processing it and, finally, letting the other person know that you have heard and understood.

In the context of conflict, this involves concentrating fully on what is being said, rather than planning a response.

By actively listening, you set aside your own thoughts and judgments to try to see the world through the eyes of the speaker.

This does not mean that you have to agree with their point of view, but it does mean that you strive to understand their perspective.

The simple fact that the other person feels heard and valued can reduce the tension of a conflict by up to 50%.

Key techniques for effective listening

To master active listening and transform it into a conflict resolution tool, you can implement these techniques:

Silence and concentration: remain silent while the other person speaks and concentrate on his or her message.

Avoid distractions, don't interrupt and strive to perceive their feelings, interests and needs.

Paraphrasing and validation: Once the person has finished speaking, summarize what you have heard in your own words.

This has a very powerful effect, as it shows them that you are present, that you have understood their point of view and that you are willing to listen to them.

In addition, paraphrasing avoids misunderstandings and gives the other person the opportunity to correct you if you have misunderstood.

Body language and verbal cues: Use your body language to show that you are engaged.

Nod your head, maintain eye contact and lean forward slightly.

These nonverbal cues, along with verbal responses such as "I understand that you are frustrated," are as important as the words you say and help create an environment more conducive to constructive dialogue.

Open-ended questions: Ask questions that cannot be answered with a simple "yes" or "no".

Questions such as "Can you tell me more about that?" or "What made you feel that way?" encourage the person to explain their thoughts and feelings, revealing the root causes of the conflict and not just the superficial symptoms.

By practicing active lis