Normalization of intense emotions

Understanding the evolutionary and communicative function of each emotion

At the advanced level of emotional management, we deepen our understanding that there are no "negative" emotions in the sense of "bad" or "unnecessary".

Each emotion, no matter how painful, has a specific evolutionary and communicative function.

Anger informs us that our limits have been transgressed or that we perceive an injustice, mobilizing us to defend ourselves.

Sadness signals us that we have lost something valuable, encouraging withdrawal to process the loss and seek social support.

Fear alerts us to potential dangers to ensure our preservation.

When we label these emotions as enemies to be defeated, we lose the vital information they bring with them.

The therapeutic work is to decode the message without being hijacked by it.

If someone feels intense envy, instead of judging him or herself as a "bad person," you can explore what that envy signals: it often reveals a deep desire or unfulfilled value that the person would want for him or herself.

By validating the function of the emotion ("it makes sense that I feel this because I care"), we reduce the secondary conflict.

We do not try to turn off the light on the car dashboard (the emotion); we try to read what fault or need that light signals so that we can act accordingly (repair, care, protect), allowing the emotion to dissipate once its informational function is fulfilled.

Emotional complexity: mixing sensations and labeling

Emotions do not usually present themselves in a pure state, but as complex cocktails of physiological sensations.

What is fascinating is that our body's biological response to very different situations can be almost identical.

Consider tachycardia, sweating hands, rapid breathing and muscle tension.

This physiological picture presents itself whether we are terrified before an exam or extremely excited before a first date with someone we really like or before riding a roller coaster.

The difference between "fear" and "excitement" (or enthusiasm) often lies in the cognitive label we apply to those sensations and the context in which they occur.

If we interpret tachycardia as "something is wrong," we feel anxiety. If we interpret it as "I'm ready and energized," we feel excitement.

In ACT, we help the client dismantle the verbal label and move down to direct physical experience.

If a client says, "I have horrible anxiety," we invite them to observe the vibrant energy in their body.

Sometimes, we can reeva luate that energy not as a signal that we should run away, but as the fuel the body provides us to